A long time ago, (it seems), when I was showing the DCoE where one purchased the gryphon mounts, I was looking at them in the vendor’s window when she exclaimed how pretty they were. I asked if she could actually see how they looked, she said, “Of course I can.” Wow, I thought, there must be some special key-combination that allows one to see what one looks like riding one of these. I wonder what it is…

Shift-right click was not it. That’s the “purchase immediately” key combination, and at the tender level of 65, I accidentally bought an epic green gryphon for 200 gold. Of course, she was looking at the birds in the stable to see what they looked like, a place I had neglected to visit.

We have continued to blame her for that bit of BRK-idiocy, much to her denials and laughter. Priests… I don’t care what their spec is, they’re all mildly evil.

But anyway, I really wanted the red epic gryphon in the worst way. So much so, that my plan was to grind an extra 200 gold before I bought the riding skill so that I’d not have to use the green gryphon in my bank at all. Well, when I hit 5001 gold yesterday, that plan went out the window. Gotta fly fast. Gotta fly fast now. Where’s that stinkin‘ green epic?

So, to the Shattrath City bank, grab the green bird, a quick stop at a vendor to sell some trash loot, and boogie over to Wildhammer and the riding trainer. In three seconds, I went from 5007 gold to 7. But who cares, I get to go fast!

…

You. Have. NO. Idea.

I was so fast, my guild chat was Doppler-shifted. You don’t understand what +288% speed is until you experience it. I need to do some time trials and post the data so you have some quantative idea of what I’m talking about. Frankly, this thing makes Outland small. Shattrath to Area-52? Pfft. Wildhammer to Zangarmarsh? Please. Look away for a moment and you’re half-way across Terokkar Forest.

And now the green guy has grown on me. I like him; I haven’t seen another whereas I’ve seen a bunch of reds. I’ve already begun collecting the mats for my +70 attack power enchant for my Quill, so I really have a better use for my gold right now than a second epic flying mount.

Yup, Greenie is gonna be BRK’s Ride. He’s got the BRK-attitude, that’s for sure. First time we brought him out, he squinted his eyes from behind his armor, looked us up and down, turned his head, spat, then looked back at his trainer. The Wildhammer dwarf gave him a single, smooth nod. Greenie then turned back toward us, leaned in a little, and in a slow, melodic rhythm, said,

“Get on. Sit Down. Shet up. Hang on.”

It was good advice.