BRK Reports from BlizzCon

BRK » 31 July 2007 » In Best of, Blog » 13 Comments

You may or may not be aware that BlizzCon 2007 is happening right now. For our field representatives, this presents a unique and rare opportunity to learn more about the possible 2008 WoW expansion and we cannot pass it up.

Thus, several partially-inebriated and completely-disheveled Blizzard programmers have been captured, gently interrogated, detoxed, rigorously re-interrogated, and released back into the wild. Their sputtering and mostly incoherent blatherings were assembled and decoded by the highly trained yet woefully underpaid staff of the BRK Cryptoanalysis and Wendy’s Baconator Research Facility. Their findings were both frightening and heavily salty:

Top Ten Possible Names of the Next WoW Expansion

10. World of Warcraft: 100% Ret Pally Free

9. World of Warcraft: First Night Elves, Then Blood Elves, Now Ovaltine Elves

8. World of Warcraft: The Rise of Hogger

7. World of Warcraft: If You’re Not First, You’re Last

6. World of Warcraft: All Booterang, All the Time

5. World of Warcraft: Just When You Thought You Were Out, You Get Pulled Back In

4. World of Warcraft: Dobby’s Revenge

3. World of Warcraft: So Long, and Thanks for All the Draenei

2. World of Warcraft: Only Runs on a Quad Xenon Processor

1. World of Warcraft: Kill Things, Make Stuff, Send Us Your $15 Already

Best of, Blog | July 31, 2007

Comments

13 Responses to “BRK Reports from BlizzCon”

  1. Jaris on July 31st, 2007 9:55 pm

    LoL “3. World of Warcraft: So Long, and Thanks for All the Draenei” very nice. Here I am stuck @ work. I hope there is some “StarCraft 2 coming out soon” announcement.

  2. Hathorn on July 31st, 2007 10:17 pm

    Starcraft is coming out in Oct ‘08, and BRK, are you actually AT Blizzcon or are you going or what?

  3. Guy on July 31st, 2007 10:18 pm

    I liked 9, 8, 7 and 3.

  4. Doogie on July 31st, 2007 10:21 pm

    Isn’t #1 what the game’s called already?

  5. Kruncs of Cho'gall on July 31st, 2007 10:26 pm

    Damn rouges got Dobby!

  6. Anonymous on July 31st, 2007 11:34 pm

    What’s the go with Ovaltine Elves? They’re not even oval, they’re round! They should be called Round Elves!

  7. Jaris on August 1st, 2007 1:55 am

    11. World of Warcraft: Rise of the Gnomes.

    *Gnome Druids added – Bear cub/Kitten/Baby seal form ftw!

    *Gnome Tinkers added – Hunter class with mechanical pets

    *Gnome Medic added – Improved bandages yields more hp healed zomg!

    Gnomeregan Heroic added

  8. Lance on August 1st, 2007 6:03 am

    LoL at Gnome Druids.

  9. Zemulos on August 1st, 2007 2:14 pm

    Lol, several of these made me laugh. :) When do I get my engineer epic mount… the helicopter?

  10. Rizzah on August 1st, 2007 3:13 pm

    LOL @ gnome druids …. if that happens, i’m changing to a class that can use maces, just so I can go club some baby seals.

  11. Anonymous on August 1st, 2007 4:59 pm

    World of Warcraft 2: Electric Boogaloo

  12. Omnimatrix on August 1st, 2007 9:12 pm

    LoL @ Rizzah:

    “…Club some baby seals.”

    priceless ^^

  13. Anonymous on August 2nd, 2007 8:48 pm

    LOL!! Rise of Hogger. I can see a book in the future..no a movie.

    -Dirtyboy and Seka
    or

    -Horndog(used to be Hornyboy) and Willow (Used to be Hornypet)
    or

    -Crotch (Warrior)

    or Squishyboy (Used to be Squishyballs) (Priest)