10questions.jpgInterviews for raiding positions in our guild is about to commence and The Boss wants to know our questions.

1. In 500 words minimum: Noobsauce or Noobcakes?

2a. Shower or Bath?

2b. Loofah or No Loofah?

3a. Does your wife/husband/GF/BF/extremely-close-pet understand your addiction to WoW and will they allow you your raiding-time uninterrupted?

3b. Will they provide you with snacks?

3c. Will you share?

4a. Can you read a WoWWebStats report? 

4b. If we tell you, “You need to do XYZ to improve your DPS, just look at the WWS report,” are you going to throw a temper-tantrum and gquit?

4c. If you see we’re clueless about your class and offer you advice that makes no sense, will you smack us over the head, explain your playstyle, offer WWS reports as a rebuttal, call us Noobilicious, and demand a small sacrifice in your glorious honor?

5a. Do you want to PvP?

5b. Do you understand that this guild is a raiding guild, not a PvP guild?

5c. Do you understand that doing PvP during raiding times isn’t the schiznit?

5d. Do you understand that the majority of this guild is not interested in PvPing full-time and that any effort on your part trying to convince them otherwise is just going to upset the apple cart?

6a. There are certain people who love to talk in vent and other who just listen. Are you a yapper or a lurker?

6b. Do you understand that listening in vent and responding in chat is one thing, but passing critical information during a raid should be spoken, not typed?

6c. Do you understand that having fun is great, but should mostly be accomplished in your private chat-channel instead of clogging vent and the raid-channel?

6d. Do you understand that cheering Fulgor when he does his self-sacrifice before every Maulgar attempt and for all other designated Fun Things, that Vent is open for all to yap?

6e. Basically, do you get the concept that Fun is Fun and Work is Work, but Raiding is both and to treat it appropriately?

7a. When Fio squees, that means epic loot dropped from a trash mob. When BRK squees, he’s probably been given a cookie. When Celli squees, that means we downed a new boss. When Cay squees, that means time hasn’t stopped and the Earth is still revolving. What does it mean when you squee?

7b. Don’t lie, of course you squee.

8a. Do you blog?

8b. Do you understand that your name may come up in one of the many guild-blogs?

8c. Especially if you say/do something especially funny/cool/noobtastic/craptacular?

9a. Can you pun?

9b. Do you understand that your ability to pun will be sorely tested by the GM?

9c. Do you understand that pun-competing with the GM in guild chat is grounds for termination with extreme prejudice by the rest of the guild?

10. Do you understand that if you are a shadow priest, you may become the personal property of BRK World Wide Amalgamated and will be henceforth married to his party, for as long as his raiding career shall live?

Bonus Question: You’re going to meet The Squeekie Priestie, The Diet Coke of Evil, Doom and TJ, Brig and Jerk and Tred and Tuan, the cavalcade of Druids: Fio, Kel, Jace, Shar, Shaz, and Dem, Carlos the Man of Love, LamaaLammaLamaa, Celli and Crux and everybody else who makes AC the insane guild we call Home.

Are you sure you want to do this?