WASHINGTON, DC and ORLANDO - BRKWWA was rocked to the foundations today by the sudden ousting of its extremely visbible and extremely vocal figurehead - on this, his birthday, of all days.

“Honestly,” the BRK EA, TJ, said at an early morning press conference, “this has been coming for quite some time now. It’s been extremely difficult to keep plans under wraps, but today, with all the pieces in place, we are proud to detail to you the new direction that BRKWWA will be taking in the future.”

The conference was held in BRKWWA headquarters, in front of the doors to the executive suite of offices, which TJ was seen leaning her head towards occasionally, seemingly for clairification before carefully and with considered measure answering the questions of assembled reporters. While the doors were never opened, we can only surmise that inside was the other half of the masterminding behind this sudden coup-staging, and sources lead to the strong belief that the mysterious counterpart behind the door is one known only as Mrs. BRK.

“Really,” TJ continued, “has it ever actually been a mystery who the driving forces behind this endeavor were? The time has come to step out from behind the curtain and take over the steering of this company into the future. My partner and I,” she said, nodding slightly towards the closed doors, “realize that this may come as somewhat of a shock. Actually, as I said earlier, this has been in the works for quite some time, and we hope that our efforts will not be seen as cloak and dagger machinations. Truly, with BRK’s somewhat… illadvised… attempts at a WoWHead takeover — Well, you can see that it was time for some fresh blood to step into the light here. Be prepared to see some new and exciting things coming from BRKWWA in the future - we have plans, big plans.” A soft, somewhat menancing chuckle was heard from behind the closed doors at this point.

After concluding her prepared statement, TJ took very few questions from the ever-growing crowd of reporters before sliding quickly between the doors behind her, ending the conference.

Q: What do you mean by “new direction?”

A: We have plans. Big plans. I’m not at liberty to reveal too much right now, but I can tell you two things. First of all, hunters are played out. Played. Out. Secondly, I think I can get away with announcing that going forward, BRKWWA will now be known as The Mrs & The Ponytail, Inc.

Q: Any significance to doing this on BRK’s birthday?

A: Where the [expletive deleted] did you go to [expletive deleted] [expletive deleted] journalism school? Do they still teach basic investigative reporting, or were you sick that day? The man is [expletive deleted] OLD. He’s OLD. He’s like 40 or 50 or something. I don’t know how they did business back in 19-diggety-2, when he was at his peak, but times have CHANGED. Out with the doddering old fo– er. Ahem. You know, new year, new beginnings.

Q: What are BRK’s plans, going forward? What about Hobbes?

A: BR who? Oh. Oh, BRK. Oh, I don’t know. Gardening, maybe? What do old people do, anyway? Whatever. We’ll probably some give him some office in the basement, maybe some pretty colored file folders and papers to shuffle around. Maybe a big rubber stamp of some sort. I don’t know, whatever keeps him busy and out of our goregeous hair. Oh, and Hobbes? We’ve found him a nice… farm. A farm, where he can run free and play forever. NO MORE QUESTIONS.

Though the conference ended rather abruptly, with many questions left unanswered, famous stealth journalist and gossip columnist Doomilias claims to have overheard Mrs. BRK in a back alley conversation early this morning.

“I’m pretty sure it was her. The long white purple striped fur coat was a dead giveaway. She had really big, dark sunglasses and was puffing on a thin cigarette with one of those trendy new tungsten cigarette holders. I couldn’t make out who she was talking to, but she sounded pretty determined. Going on and on about how BRK is starting to slip in his old age. Apparently he’s been roaming their backyard carrying one of those Nerf Bow’n'Arrows, wearing nothing but a level 62 Loincloth of the Gorilla and muttering ‘massssssive quantities of sustained ranged dps. Dps. Dee. Pee. Ess! It’s so pretty my DPS!’.”

Happy birthday, BRK.

<3, Mrs. BRK, TJ and special guest beat reporter Doomilias.