Let Loose the Lawyers of War
CNN News Flash! Dateline, Orlando.
Today, the legal division of BRK Worldwide Amalgamated filed suit in Federal Court against the owner and proprietor of The Big Bear Butt, Inc. for violations of copyright and patent fraud.
“That’s right, B^4 dropped, with malice and forethought, a “foshizzle”! He taunted us with it! We’ll put up with a lot, but that ain’t gonna stand!” BRK himself screamed, from the top of the steps, perched upon a small piece of luggage.
“We’ll take that bear, kite his @ss up the courthouse steps, and shave him down! His Mark of the Wild is gonna expire and he’ll get no rebuffs! Stealth isn’t gonna save that guy now; this is war!!” blathered the obviously hung-over and stressed-out CEO.
In its filing, BRKWWA enumerated several hundred blog-posts where he uses “foshizzle” and proclaims eminent domain over its use.
“Snoop is totally tight with several board members of BRKWWA and regularly plays putt-putt with our HR director. He totally let us have Bogart-Rights to ‘foshizzle’ and we intend to defend those rights, all the way to the Supreme Court if we must. Scalia plays a hunter, did you know that Bear-Boy?!” BRK stumbled to one knee at this point, muttered several inappropriate invectives, but didn’t appear to spill any of his… water.
“We’ve defended our content-rights in many lawsuits in the past two years. We had tremendous victories over several bloggers who dared invade our turf. The one hung-jury was not our fault; we don’t know how that weasel got in the courtroom, or who put the “Rogues: Exhibit A” sign on its back.”
As BRK’s gaggle of lawyers and boot-lickers attempted to form a human chain to prevent him from reaching the podium directly, he performed a really bad impression of Darth Sidious, whipped out a Mr. Microphone and spittle-yelled one final time to the assembled mob.
“As Elune as our witness, we’ll never allow a druid to beat us in battle! Be it PvP, arena, DPS, or the courtroom, BRKWWA will be there to ensure to dominance of hunters over the lesser classes.
“It just so happens that today we’re taking aim at the druids in the world, and making people realize what sleazy cheaters they all are. Form-shifting sure sounds like a dirty rogue-trick to us! Dressing up as trees is just camouflage! They have their own ZONE for cryin’ out loud; they’re aggressors! Down with Druids! Make ‘em all become hunter-pets, like they were designed to be! Let the smell of burnt cat hair be our war cry! AAAUUGGHH!”
Of course, a war-cry is a sound, not a smell. This has been CNN’s Robin Meade reporting.
CNN Editor’s Note: In the interest of fair reporting, it should be noted that Mrs. Meade plays a female Blood Elf Shadow Priest on an RPPvP realm.
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FOSHIZZLE!!
BRK. That is funny shizzle…FOSHIZZLE!!!
Yeah, druids have their own zone… but there’s nothing in it. The only stuff that ever happens there is all non-druid, like Omen.
May have to think twice about FOSHIZZLE being my new favorite word. Can’t afford a law suit………………
Dang, just picked it as my new favorite word yesterday.
Guess I’ll go listen to some House of Pain.
Wow, she’s hot…
she does? I remember when cnn stole her from us in Chicago. She was on every night. Curse them we hates them!
oops not on at night. the ajax edit tool doesn’t work with IE7 on Vista, apparently.
I remember when this blog had useful and interesting information. Now it’s just micro-sized updates about boring details and completely stupid posts like this. Don’t forget that you have so many readers for a reason.
So saying foshizzle is a no-no?
OH, I KNOW you didn’t just…
Okay short britches, it’s ON!
I feel oppressed.
[...] This one’s for YOU, BRK. [...]
I suddenly have a reason to watch the news again.
Rawr.
[...] saddens me that our once great adversary has lost the fire, the will to [...]
http://thebigbearbutt.com/2008/07/19/bring-it-on-calvin/
The druids be fighting back!
@Former Fan: If you were looking for a hardcore hunter blog, you ought be looking elsewhere. This blog is definitely about hunters, yes, and has a lot of good information, but it’s also about comedy and BRK as a player. If you consider the latest post – the guild’s progress through BT – a “micro-sized update about boring details”, well, there’s a door for a reason. Some of us read the blog because we like BRK as a person, not just as a spout of hunter information. (And even so, if you wanted to just ignore everything but the hunter information, you can do that – the sidebar’s right there.)
Siobhann stealths into BRK’s blog in cat form. *pounce* FOSHIZZLE!
Siobhann cyclones BRK while he’s still foshizzle-stunned, roots Hobbes, shapeshifts to travel form and runs for it!
[...] BRK [...]
[...] the first lawyer tripped the pullwire attached to the Claymores on the back approach, I knew something was [...]
I’m in conflict. My first 70 is a Beast Master hunter who owes much of her finesse to things learned from BRK. On the other hand, my new Druid just got himself to level 70 and is proudly tanking for his guild and working on his Kara gear.
To Foshizzle or not to Foshizzle…
Um, like, “Orlando WoW reprazent”, and stuff.
Or something.
The rustling of the trees will not be quieted…
[...] in the name of “Foshizzle”, if you don’t know what I am talking about, go here first, then there, then here, and back here…response have been overwhelming as Druids make their voices known and [...]
Foshizzle, Dr00ds!
[...] Anyways … This one’s for you BEE ARR KAY! [...]
[...] can roll all classes is an odd thing isn’t it. I’ve been staying out of the BBB & BRK catfight, seeing as I’m nothing but a lowly reader of these legends of the Blogspheres and [...]
[...] around the deep and secret glade of the Moon. The wind shivered and sighed, bearing with it tidings most dire, of opression, of [...]